Things to Throw Onstage

If you've ever been to a concert and you've been lucky enough to score rather decent seats, then more than likely you brought stuff to chuck up onstage in hopes of showing your love and adoration for the band through small gifts (Beanie Babies, spare change, a pencil). So, I came up with my own list of things to throw onstage during the next tour. These will guarantee you an odd look from a band member or two, or maybe even your image seared permanently into their memories. *Note: I am not responsible for any actions that may occur after these objects are tossed on stage. Throw at your own risk.*

- Condoms (these are a MUST. They won't hurt if they hit a guy in the band, plus they can use them later, PLUS it's hard for them to forget a fan who threw condoms onstage)

- Barbie dolls

- A check for a large sum of money...that can't be cashed in until the year 2457

- A slinky (ooo I love those toys)

- A tape of you singing the entire YOSLY CD...off key

- A banana (I am NOT responsible if you throw this onstage and someone slips and sues! LOL)

- A moose potholder (hey, I haven't seen one yet, but as soon as I do I'm snatching it up!)

- Coins that plainly say 'no cash value' (another way to get their hopes up before they come crashing to the ground)

- Pogs (whatever happened to those anyway?)

- Doll clothing

- A ribbon for first place in a pumpkin growing contest from a local fair (hey, you're throwing everything and the kitchen sink up there, so why not this?)

- Cottonballs ('OOOO IT'S SNOWING!')

- A glasses case

- Those poofy bath wash things (You know they use them)

- A leaking bottle of superglue (Another must. Either one of the band members or a roadie will not have a fun night)

- A chia pet (be careful where you aim this, as this could hurt)

- A spool of yarn

- Empty soda cans (depending on what state you're in, they could get refunds!)

- A huge, face size pin of N SYNC ('Yo yo homie, you kickin' it at da hotel?' LOL...that's from the Spin article..)

- A popel

- A magnet saying 'I love my grandma!'

- A pair of socks (for those cold nights..)

- Dixie cups

- A Martha Stewart Living Magazine (It's a good thing)

- A watermelon (this one's risky, you could get kicked out for this one..lol..)

- Dog collars

- Lip gloss (get the kind that has glitter in it)

- A bowtie (those things are so..uh...cute?)

- A Ziplock bag filled with your choice of foodstuffs (non perishable or not, it's your choice)

- Packets of Ketchup

- Scrunchies (they love those things..you know they do!)

- Your artistic interpretation of Paul and Rob's wedding (my absolute favorite on this list and the one I'm defintely going to do at the next concert)

- Spam! (Spiced Ham...I mean..SPICED HAM HERE PEOPLE!)

- Large plastic bugs (make sure they look realistic enough)

- A Third Eye Blind CD

- A B*witched poster (their secret obsession..shhhh)

- Condoms..filled with water and mayo...(a twist on the condoms one...this will make things a LOT more interesting at a concert)

- Pickles with nametags

- Tampons and other feminine hygeine products (another must)

- Leopard skin speedos

- Fake vomit

- A tape of you singing the entire Third Eye Blind CD..ON key

- An eight track of the Partridge Family

- The website address to a tribute of Milli Vanilli

- One of those peanut cans where a snake pops out

- A gift certificate for Bath and Body Works (Could you just imagine the band wandering around, lost in a Bath and Body Works? ::snickers::)

- A remote control